Today we will celebrate by just being together and going out to dinner if Bill feels well enough. In a 45 year marriage as you may guess, there are many hurdles to negotiate and many obstacles to overcome-as well as the joy and friendship.
Only God can make a marriage last this long-IMO. Two people who both are very strong willed are a recipe for disaster without Christ and His grace.We have had more in the way of loss than many couples-including the death of our only child in an auto accident 12 years ago. Even though we have grieved in very different ways-God has comforted us and brought us through it together.
I am afraid I am short on patience when it comes to complaining about a marriage-unless one has very serious issues. I know that with prayer and humility-things can be worked out between a Christian couple. If you can't work it out-get some help-there are lots of helpful resources available for couples.
Let me tell you what I know after 45 years of being married to the same man(I am speaking to Christians here).
1. God does not put you in a marriage to get your needs met.
2. Marriage is the greatest sanctifier in the Christian life.
3. You are married so that you can serve and love that person and grow in the grace of Christ.
4. Marriage is not a 50/50 give and take deal-it requires a 100% commitment by each party.
5. If you don't get 100% from your spouse-keep on giving 100% yourself-it brings great glory to God.
6. Please remember that in marriage feelings can wax and wane-illness can come-you are committed to that person for life-because of your commitment to God-this is a covenant relationship that God designed to last a lifetime.
7. Be prepared to give much more than you take.
These are 7 things that we have practiced (and many times failed to practice-the reason grace and forgiveness are needed in abundance) that have kept us together and loving each other for all of these years: in the midst of loss and illness-God Himself has brought us to this place.
Today-I thank God for my beloved Bill-the one I have loved since I was 15 years old-and by God's Grace have spent most of my life with.
Congratulations Vicki and Bill! Wonderful post. Beautiful reminder for me. Have a great day!
ReplyDeleteWell said, Vicki. Valuable even to old spinsters like me.
ReplyDeleteHappy anniversary to you and Bill. Thanks for sharing these words of wisdom, and may the Lord continue to bless your marriage.
ReplyDeleteThank you dear ladies for your kind comments-and do remember I am talking to people where BOTH parties are committed to a lifetime covenant. You can never make your spouse do the right thing, if he or she decides to do the wrong thing.
ReplyDeleteHappy Anniversary Vickie and Bill! You have given a wonderful list to encourage the younger wives here.
ReplyDeleteGod bless you both!
you are invited to follow my blog
ReplyDeleteHi Vicki,
ReplyDeleteI really liked your list and found myself saying- that's my favorite -after each one! I think I need to print these out and keep it handy as a reminder when I don't feel like doing these things.
You have shown us a beautiful and true definition of how marriage is to be. May God continue to give you His grace for all He has for you to do.
I can also say that I agree 100% with your last sentence--the one that you highlighted. I also met my Bill at age 15 as a sophomore in high school. He has been in my life ever since and we have been married 30 years.
Happy, Happy Anniversary.
Wow! Refreshing to hear straightforward truth about marriage. It's time believers were direct with one another about marriage. It's a tough gig but God is tougher still. We're looking at our 23rd anniversary approaching - we've had our share and it's truly only God who has kept us together but celebrating together is the victory! Thanks for this. I look forward to more.
ReplyDeleteThanks Diane I am glad you are blogging again.
ReplyDeleteThanks to you Steve-but you should know that I am Calvinist to the core!
And dear Diane-thanks for your comments-one should know SOMETHING about marriage after 45 years huh?
Thanks Lori-so glad I found your blog-I just love it!
And Rozie-thank you-you are on my mind and in my heart these days.
ReplyDeleteVicki,
ReplyDeleteHappy Anniversary! What a beautiful post so full of truth.
:-) Vicki-
ReplyDeleteWe are just married for 30 years, not 45. We met at 15, dated for about 8 years and then got married after college. You're still the winner!
:-)
Disregard my last comment. I thought you thought we were married 45 years, but now I know what you meant. God bless! :-)
ReplyDeleteJust 30 years? That is a winner in anyone's book. I think that after 25 years -we all get a medal, :-)
ReplyDeleteVicki,
ReplyDeleteI just recently finished reading chapter 3 of the book "Help Heavenward" by Octavius Winslow. Chapter 3 is entitled: The Burdened Gently Led By Christ. It really encouraged me and I think it will you too. We all have our heavy burdens, some very heavy, and I love the great care Winslow takes to describe the gentle leading with which Christ leads His people under their afflictions. God bless, sister.
Oh- you can read it free online at the Octavius Winslow Archives. :-)
ReplyDeleteThanks Diane for the tip on the Winslow book-I am looking forward to reading that on Friday when I have some free time.
ReplyDeleteI know I'm late to the party, but congrats on this, Vickiann!
ReplyDeleteoh but-better late than never-thanks Lane.
ReplyDelete